Warning: this post may ruffle some feathers, with love.
As a photographer, I get to work with really incredible people. My wedding and elopement clients are looking to have their epic relationships photographed in a way that authentically captures their relationship and how they interact. My brand photography clients are strong women who have powerful messages and purposes to share with the world, and they're looking for photos that are inviting, engaging, and real.
One thing that I know for certain is that when we show up in the world, living our purpose, speaking our truth, we will change lives. Whether we show up by doing a Facebook Live, or an Instagram post, or by having coffee with a new connection, it all makes a difference. Yet, there are times when we just don't feel like "showing up". Maybe that little voice in our head is saying, "What's the point anyway?" Perhaps we feel lost and not sure what is the next right step to take.
When it comes to posting a photo or video of ourselves for our business, there's something even more prevalent that I hear clients, friends, and connections say: it's something along the lines of, "I just don't really like how I look in photos all the time."
Did you feel a pang of resonance in your chest as you read that?
This is so heartbreaking to me because, as I view these women either through the lens of my camera or on social media or in person, I see these beautiful, impactful, incredible women. These are women with fire and love and joy and purpose. We are often our own worst critic. Rather than seeing ourselves as magical and radiant goddesses, we are taught to pick ourselves apart and focus on our flaws the moment we see a photo.
While we're criticizing ourselves, we're delaying from making that post that could change someone's life; we're delaying from writing that email newsletter that includes an offer that will make your next client say, "Yes!" for the first time; we're delaying from creating the life of our dreams.
Friends, I want you to read this to yourself a couple times to let it sink in: the shape and weight of your body is one of the least interesting things about you. In comparison to how you make a difference in the world – in comparison to how the service or product you provide is life-changing – in comparison to how magnificent and great and POWERFUL your purpose is, how could we possibly let something like how our body looks in any given photo keep us from showing up? Society tells us that these things matter, but here's what I think are some higher truths:
When you are fully embodying your purpose and brand's message, your weight or body shape is not going to turn your ideal client away.
We are 100% worthy of feeling and looking great in our brand photos, and that starts with how we view ourselves.
Your words and actions make more of a difference than what the vessel your soul currently lives in looks like.
We can choose at any point to change our perception of ourselves, and we can choose to show up as healthy, happy, and magnetic.
I'm present to the fact that there can be health issues associated with body image, as well as mental health concerns and other matters. However, I know that many in this community I speak to are currently or have done "the work" – coaching, therapy, counseling, etc. I share this concept with the notion that as growing, empowered, awakened women, we get to bust up the “Body Image Obstacle” when it's keeping us from moving our businesses and lives forward.
I think the poet Rupi Kaur says it best:
"I want to apologize to all the women
I have called pretty.
Before I've called them intelligent or brave.
I am sorry I made it sound as though
something as simple as what you're born with
is the most you have to be proud of
when your spirit has crushed mountains.
From now on I will say things like, 'you are resilient'
or, 'you are extraordinary.'
Not because I don't think you're pretty.
But because you are so much more than that."
Sending you love, compassion, and kindness,
Kate
